Before I stopped watching television I started observing the effects it was having on me. I noticed the crime shows I used to love were now making me cringe and I would change the channel immediately. The stars of dramatic sitcoms were sucking me into their drama and I'd finish an hour-long program with my heart racing, along with my mind. Since I am often surrounded by people in the entertainment business - writers, performers, directors, producers, etc. - I realized that the whole point of entertainment (movies, television, theater, etc) is to tell a story in a way that the audience can connect to it and be moved by it. The more I heard this the more I realized how successful television had been at moving me emotionally, but not always for the better.
Our subconsciousness is way more powerful than our consciousness. When we absorb things subconsciously it has an impact on us that we don't always recognize which in my mind seems much more dangerous. For example, when I used to watch crime shows I thought what I loved about it was the psychological component of figuring out "who did it" and why (my conscious thinking). In the last few months I realized what I was really absorbing from it was a negative energy filled with murder, rape, blood, and guts. While consciously I can tell myself "it's OK, this isn't happening to me" those images have an impact on me subconsciously whether I like it or not.
As I began noticing this I started asking myself, "Why am I inviting this negative energy into my body?" I started feeling like TV was my drug and I couldn't live without it. But I wanted to, desperately. I felt like it was eating up all my creative energy. So I did what any person who thinks they can "recover" all by herself does - I went cold turkey.
The withdrawals haven't been all that bad. I notice it more on specific days of the week and/or times of the day. Sunday night was tough. I really wanted my fix of 60 Minutes more so than Desperate Housewives or Brothers & Sisters. I also notice the withdrawal in the mornings. I used to *love* watching The Ellen DeGeneres Show while I was getting ready for my day.
I wonder if, when my 40 days are up, I'll be able to "use" recreationally and responsibly or if I'll go back to my old ways. I guess I won't know until I try.
13 days down, 27 to go...
As I began noticing this I started asking myself, "Why am I inviting this negative energy into my body?" I started feeling like TV was my drug and I couldn't live without it. But I wanted to, desperately. I felt like it was eating up all my creative energy. So I did what any person who thinks they can "recover" all by herself does - I went cold turkey.
The withdrawals haven't been all that bad. I notice it more on specific days of the week and/or times of the day. Sunday night was tough. I really wanted my fix of 60 Minutes more so than Desperate Housewives or Brothers & Sisters. I also notice the withdrawal in the mornings. I used to *love* watching The Ellen DeGeneres Show while I was getting ready for my day.
I wonder if, when my 40 days are up, I'll be able to "use" recreationally and responsibly or if I'll go back to my old ways. I guess I won't know until I try.
13 days down, 27 to go...
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